'I'm always looking for the Hows and the Whys and the Whats,' said Muskrat, 'That is why I speak as I do. You've heard of Muskrat's Much-in-Little, of course?'
'No,' said the child. 'What is it?'
- The Mouse and his Child. Russell Hoban.

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Wednesday 28 December 2011

The Corker-lyser Man


When the Christmas wine comes out of the fridge, out of the drawer emerges a frightening figure. Object of my daughter's childhood fears, and invented, aided and abetted by her brothers, this nasty creature comes alive. His face is menacingly blank, he waves his arms up and down, his shoulders are prickly, and his one, shiny, sharp leg, can drill holes in your skin! So, beware, here comes the CORKER-LYSER MAN to get you!


8 comments:

  1. Oh that's just so silly! In fact it's at my level of silly so I'm surprised that I've never noticed it before.

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  2. Yes but Geeb, you should see my daughter react when J. moves towards her jiggling the 'arms' up and down!

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  3. We've had one just like that since I was a small child and it's ALWAYS scared me!

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  4. I see it. Good thing I don't have one or I'd have to lock the drawer at night...

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  5. Ahahaha!! Don't tell me your parents used to scare you with that thing! LOL!

    We used to have one just like it but now we have an even better one which is easier to use .. but it doesn't look like a blank-faced, two armed, one-legged monster!

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  6. Jay - my parents had something far, far worse: a huge thing that ended in a fat needle, with which one pierced the cork, then pumped air into the bottle, and the cork was pushed out by the air pressure. I hated it from the moment I learned you die if you get air in your veins. Which was unfortunately at an early age because my mother was a nurse.

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  7. LOL! I learned a lot of horrible facts like that quite early too, because my mother was also a nurse!

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  8. Yes, Jay. And there are plenty of others too. But some hilarious prank-stories also! Like sending the new nurse to Doctor M. get a box of fallopian tubes. (The Doctor apparently asked which nurse had sent her, and then told her to go back and tell Nurse B. that he was clean out of fallopian tubes at the moment.)

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